A rare first edition of the Bible has been found in a charity shop in West Street, Bridport. An eagle eyed Clergyman bought the book with the collected works of James Herriot.
The Clergyman who has a penchant for antiquarian books was passing through Bridport on his way to his holiday destination in Devon when he noticed the abundance of charity shops in West Street. The Right Reverend Bruce Stanhope of the Archdiocese of Melling who wishes to remain anonymous decided to park his car in the bus stop outside Scummerfields and investigate.
Reverend Stanhope said, “I was flicking through a copy of Les Miserables by Victor Hugo that had a particularly well preserved flysheet when my attention was drawn to the first edition bible by a shaft of heavenly light piercing the dust motes above the periodicals which was accompanied by a wave of angelic choristers.”
Realising the fact that he had inadvertently stumbled upon a priceless piece of theological history the Reverend purchased the artifact for 50 pence. Radiocarbon dating has verified the artifact as original. However this has caused consternation amongst theologians as an additional page at the end of the Bible states:
“The events and characters depicted in this book are fictitious. Any similarity to actual persons, living or dead, is purely coincidental."
I think every bible should contain this caveat and be placed in the Fiction sections of book shops. Now where did I put my little red book?....
Posted by The Bat, on 10-09-2007 17:38,
This doesn't surprise me in the least. Only last week I bought a copy of the Koran hand written by Mohammed himself in that little second hand shop in East Street. And the week before that I noticed the two original stone tablets on which were inscribed the ten commandments propping up an old bamboo umbrella stand in the RSPCA second hand shop in West Street. I know they were the originals because the words [I]'These stone tablets belong to Moses, if found please return to Moses, care of The Burning Bush, Mount Sinai, Isreal'[/I] was written on the back of each of them. I have also heard that the lost Ark of The Covenant is actually being used as a storage chest in the Town Hall [I](top of the stairs apparently).[/I]
Posted by draino, on 10-09-2007 17:46,
I'll tell you what's a good book the sanskrit epic ""The Mahabharata"" With more than 74,000 verses - about 1.8 million words in total I've split it into four to prop up my Escort while I change the exhaust.
Posted by The Bat, on 10-09-2007 18:02,
We're all going to BURN :(
Posted by Rustic, on 25-09-2007 17:23,
I would have thought that the right rogering reverend would have done the right thing and sold the bargain bible and donated the money to the charity shop where he bought it. MInd you that would probably be a little to close to being ""christian"" for a member of the clergy.
Posted by tuzo, on 26-09-2007 11:16,
would you have done that rustic?
Posted by Rustic, on 27-09-2007 15:38,
massive cock fighter and shirtlifter (a match made in heaven if I may be so bold) it is very simple so I will type slowly in case you miss any of it. Seagulls live by the sea, not always on it and they have an established colony right here where we (people) have decided to live. Some cretinous morons over the years have been foolish and bone idle enough to leave out their rubbish in handy black containers called bin bags, which the gulls have come to learn (and pass down the generations contain food, (we didn't have the problem when everything was in bins however that is for another debate). Some dungforbrains (probably northern chuff monkeys down here on holiday) actually went to the extreme of feeding them as, apart from their partners, they never get to see wildlife living as they do in some squalid inner city slum. The gulls oblivious to the stupidity of people, eat the free food, become very healthy and as a result decide to extend their colony onto the convenient roofs of nearby houses and factories. They can't do anything about it, it is a gulls nature, we however as humans could take more care and some precautions to dissuade them from being a menace. Talking of menaces I see that the weasel tuzo is still sniping away with snide, inane, little comments, it is a pity that the annoying little toerag can't get involved with re-invigorating the debate about a very emotive and real Bridport issue, rather than loitering about like a pervert at the King street toilets. Welcome back Carlito, get stuck in there sunner.
Posted by tuzo, on 28-09-2007 14:11,
how do you get holier than thou anyway? always wondered that... by being thrown to lions? would sure create a lot of holes not there before? dear rustic, an atheist? I believe this is very fashionable at the moment, Martin Amis and comrades promote this exciting new spin on belief?
Posted by Rustic, on 29-09-2007 19:40,
Hey Ed if I remember rightly, myself and the other keyboard assassin Carlito decided to fall on the sword for the summer to prevent the constant barrage of sniping and abuse that had beset the BR pages, scaring off potential other users. After my rather glorious summer break I have again been contributing my portion of opinion only to find that the snivelling lickspittle Tuzo is still here sneaking in with inane snide remarks that do nothing to fuel the debate and whose only purpose would be to antagonise, or indeed insult the targets. See cull the gull etc I find it akin to one of those irritating scabs that you know you shouldn’t pick but you can't help yourself but from now on I am going to try. I think that the only way to deal with a whimpering toe-rag like Tuzo is to just ignore ""it"" so although I am more than happy to continue getting stuck into the debate I will ignore the tedious tuze.
Posted by Carlito, on 01-10-2007 15:10,
yes...that's right. Tuzo and I are in total alliance now on all issues. We're opening a market stall together called ""Bygones and Cuddles"", that will sell friendship bands in a variety of colours. Made of dyed far-eastern cotton, and assembled by well fed, watered and housed adult workers in Indonesia. And of course, comparing her to a metal detector enthusiast is a compliment beyond all compliments. Metal Detectors ROCK. Oh how her ring twitches at every sniff! IDIOTS... oh...whilst I'm on a) Get a wheelie bin b) Don't use cars that are so posh you worry about corrosive seagull poo. c) Paint your house seagull poo colour... d) Ignore germs, life's too short. e) Use clothes horses indoors. It does seem that you have been somewhat singled-out by them Shirtlifter. Go back to your jiz-ruined Ray Mears Survival guide and finish off will you?
Posted by Massive Cock Fighter, on 01-10-2007 15:52,
Hey Rustic.(9) Well said that Man...!!! Like your good self I enjoy a decent, intelligent, well tempered debate....get me down th pub and I will philosophise till the cows come home......... But the likes of the Oik you mentioned ('Lickspittle' I like that..!) just get in the way and irritate with their inane, snide, drivvel..... where's Shagsack? he's good in any discussion.....!
The Clergyman who has a penchant for antiquarian books was passing through Bridport on his way to his holiday destination in Devon when he noticed the abundance of charity shops in West Street. The Right Reverend Bruce Stanhope of the Archdiocese of Melling who wishes to remain anonymous decided to park his car in the bus stop outside Scummerfields and investigate.
