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 Due to a recent spate of Cornish pasties masquerading as Dorset pasties in shops, cafés and restaurants in Bridport and the surrounds, Local Trading Standards Officers have raided several outlets and issued warnings to those vending the filthy imposters. Although the counterfeit pasties are extremely difficult to spot with a crimped crust and an egg glaze, the taste is the giveaway. Local Trading Standards Occifer said: “There is only one place to buy a real Dorset Pasty and that is Leakers on East Street, no further comment, no pictures, goodbye.”
How to spot the tell tale signs of a forged pasty: - Dorset Pasties have peas.
- Cornish Pasties do not.
- Crust crimping on a Dorset pasty is clockwise left to right.
- Crust crimping on a Cornish pasty is anticlockwise right to left.
- Dorset Pasty is crimped over the top, similar to a Pastysaurus.
- Cornish pasty is crimped on the long edge.
- A Stegossauruss is an extinct Pastievore
We contacted Michelle Powell of world famous Leakers Bakery fame, Expert: “Our pasties are baked fresh every day, we mix our filling evenly, unlike the Cornish who tend to blob the meat at the front leading to disappointment when you hit the bulk of the potato, with a Leakers Large Pasty (1.30P) you enjoy an even spread right the way through the savoury product.” Bridport Radio Reporter: “What’s best, Hot or cold?” Expert: “Our pasty eating customers prefer them warm for lunch and cold for tea.” Bridport Radio reporter ”Why is that?” Expert: “I don’t know.” Bridport Radio reporter: “Is there a British Standard or an iSO reference for the make up of a standard pasty?” Expert: “No, don’t be an idiot, it’s a savoury, not a helicopter part.” Bridport Radio reporter: “Can we have the recipe?” Expert: “No, clear off!” 
Local Trading Standards Officers working for the counterfeit pie division are convinced the pasties originate from the Far East. “We are convinced the imitation savoury snack originates from the Far East, and we don’t mean Barking” Said the spokesperson.  Kate and Sidney Pie  We think we know who may be responsible… Please send in your recipe’s and baking tips. KEEP ‘EM PEELED.
Denzille De Ville
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