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 It’s official, Bridport is to Install the World’s first Park and Slide scheme to ease traffic congestion, the Slide which will operate during peak periods 9pm–10pm September to April. Running from the top of Colmers hill in the West of town and corkscrewing through Symos and Allington, over the post office, delivering shoppers to the heart of town where shopkeepers are already fighting over the location of the landing pad.
 Tatt Modern slide and how the Bridport slide will look
The slide is based on an idea used at London’s trendy Tatt Modern gallery on the South Bank of the river London, in London. Similar in shape to the DNA helix of most humans, the slide delivers punters from the top floor (impressionist, Mike Yarwood Gallery) to the ground floor (Cubist) gallery in a swift and efficient way. Since the slides use no energy they have a carbon footprint rating of 0 Clarkes. Delivery double edged whammy.
The slide will enable delivery drivers to drop off their huge loads at the top of Colmers Hill and still get home in time for tea. White van man will no longer plague the residents of Bridport Town.  Plague |  German Slide Technologists examining the site |
Colmers design statement.
Colmers Hill has been designated as the start point for the scheme since it is just a hill with some knocked out pine trees on top. The area has been appraised by slide technologists from The Berlin Slide Technology Institution.  Slide dogs for the blind
The cost estimated at £35million will be quickly recouped by the charging system, as follows.
ADULTS £2
OAPS £10
CHILDREN £35
DELIVERY DRIVERS £10 PER LOAD
ROLLERCOASTER RIDING FREAKS £200
DOGS £1 (EXCEPT GUIDE DOGS £5, WHO SHOULD KNOW BETTER)
Snag is…
Punters will have to walk back to their cars, with all their shopping and stuff.  Special rates for children This is Scoop Doggy Style for Bridport Radio, always first with da good stuff innit.
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