A rare first edition of the Bible has been found in a charity shop in West Street, Bridport. An eagle eyed Clergyman bought the book with the collected works of James Herriot.

Inspired by Carlito’s query in another thread suggesting the collective noun of a ‘pride of homosexuals’ (derived from the phrase ‘gay pride’), I thought it may be a good time to start a new thread on this tired and lacklustre website. I suggest that collective nouns and their derivatives are included, e.g.

 “Let them drink champagne!” Camilla tells local flood victims
 
Amid scenes of unprecedented chaos in flood-stricken Gloucestershire, a mass evacuation of 500,000 residents is under way after rapidly diminishing drinking water supplies became contaminated with sewage seeping from collapsed drains at Highgrove House, the Pretender to the Throne's country mansion.

Hugh Fearnley-Whittingstall has been offered a cameo role in the next League of Gentlemen Release a film “Keeping it In the Family” due to be released in 2008. The team at the League of Gentlemen appear to have approached him for reasons of budget. Hugh, being notoriously cheap in the industry, has not only the benefit of being entirely flexible for shoot dates due to his empty calendar, but has the benefit of a pig-nosed snout, usually associated with those lacking in genetic variety.

Why do we hear of " Carbon footprints" When it is Carbon Dioxide we are talking about, not carbon itself. The only carbon footprints are left by messy chimney sweeps. Soon, fizzy drinks and lager will be banned as our government tries to feel guilty about our effect on the environment.That means we can be taxed for any thing we want to do which generates geenhouse gases; driving, flying, belching, farting, curry eating etc. Water vapour is one of the greatest greenhouse gases, so expect a tax on clouds soon.

Have you seen what they've done to the Cerne Giant? Yes a 180 foot Homer Simpson has been painted  (in water soluble paint) alongside our cocky friend. A pagan spokesman says "I'm amazed they got permission to do something so ridiculous" well don't be - the landowner was given a large swedge of cash (probably wished he'd asked for more now). The pagans have been doing a rain dance to try and get it washed away, great stuff guys, this is the best weather we've had for ages. So for a prize of a glazed doughnut -  Try and think of a caption for this picture, what are the big lads saying to each other?

Do you think the rain we are experiencing this summer (2007) is anything new? Forget it, on the 18th July 1955 in sleepy Martinstown near Dorchester, 279mm, that’s nearly 11 inches of rain falling in a single 24hr period drenching locals and holidaymakers including pop star Nik Kershaw who was 3 months old at the time. The record breaking deluge pushed normally sunny Dorset to the top of the charts and we’ve been there ever since.